The Power of Relationship

I remember a wonderful couple that began attending my church. A mutual friend had introduced me to them many years before so when they started looking for a new church, they naturally tried mine. After a few visits they decided to make our church their new home. I enjoyed seeing them each Sunday.

Within a year of attending my church the husband’s brother died unexpectedly. Their friends from their old church rallied around them and provided emotional support and encouragement during the difficult time. In the process, this wonderful couple realized they had not established many new relationships at my church. Although they loved my church, they soon shared with me that they were going back to their old church because they needed the emotional support of their friends during this time.

Seeing them go broke my heart. I still remember the call as if it was yesterday. I was at my daughter’s field hockey game when I took the call. I walked away a short distance under a large tree, and there I learned they would be leaving.

The incident showed me powerfully the importance of relationships. If you want to make progress in your spiritual growth, relationships must be a part of the process. This is particularly true in your relationship with Jesus Christ.

It is very apparent from the Scriptures that we cannot experience the spiritual growth we desire apart from relationships with other followers of Jesus. But what do we do in our relationships with other followers of Jesus? How do those relationships look and feel? Is there one pattern of relationship that is more effective for producing spiritual growth than another?

Probably the best answers to these questions come from the early followers of Jesus.

The early followers of Jesus:

The best description of the relationships between followers of Jesus in the Bible occurs at the very beginning of the church. Jesus had recently been crucified and resurrected. Shortly thereafter the Apostle Peter stands up and preaches the first sermon after the resurrection. As a result, 3000 people became Christians, and overnight a large Christian community is formed. The activities the early followers of Jesus engaged in together are then described in Acts 2:42-47. Overall, they engaged in four basic activities.

Four activities:

First, they began devoting themselves to the Apostles’ teaching. The apostles were the ones who had spent three years with Jesus during his ministry. They were the ones who knew the teaching of Jesus the best.

Second, they devoted themselves to fellowship. Their gatherings were important, and the relationships they had with one another were important. They were devoted to being with one another and made it a priority.

Third, they broke bread together. This is probably a reference to celebrating the Lord’s Supper together. It was during the “Last Supper” with his disciples that Jesus commanded his Apostles to break bread together until he returned.

Fourth, they prayed. They were devoted to prayer, which meant that they prayed often, but more importantly, they prayed together.

Two locations:

In addition to engaging in these activities, it is necessary to mention that the early followers of Jesus engaged in these activities in two distinct places. First, every day they continued to meet together in the temple courts. This does not mean that every single follower of Jesus in Jerusalem met every single day with the other followers of Jesus in the temple courts. What it probably means is that there were ongoing meetings among the followers of Jesus in the temple courtyard each day, and the early followers of Jesus came and went, as they were able.

In addition to meeting together in the temple courts, the early followers of Jesus also broke bread in their homes and ate together. I would imagine as they got to know one another they consistently invited one another over to their homes for meals, and in that context, continued to pursue the four activities together.

The key, however, is not the two locations or the activities in which they participated. The most important thing is that the followers of Jesus participated in these activities together. Relationship was a clear focus of their spiritual community.

One mistake I often see followers of Jesus making is separating spiritual activities from relationships. So a typical follower of Jesus might say: “I want to grow spiritually like they did, so I am going to do what they did. I am going to be devoted to the Apostles teaching by reading my Bible. I am going to be devoted to fellowship by getting to church regularly. I am going to be devoted to prayer by trying to pray more.”

However, as every follower of Jesus attempting to grow spiritually through these means finds out, the activities by themselves don’t work as well when practiced alone. They are much more effective for producing spiritual growth when practiced together with other followers of Jesus. It is the activities conducted in the context of relationship which produce spiritual growth.

To put it another way, a spiritual activity pursued alone is certainly of some benefit to your spiritual growth. A spiritual activity pursued in the context of growing and developing authentic relationships with other followers of Jesus produces enormous spiritual growth.